Movies

The Oscars happened! And with them, a very particular subset of a very particular level of performance comes to its annual end, leaving behind nothing but the inescapable web of industry positioning and image management, punctuated by occasional moments of deep satisfaction. (Ten years from now, those brave souls who walk past the Dolby Theater in the dark Los Angeles night will swear the phantom guests who applauded Parasite’s Best Picture win are clapping still.) As always, I am fascinated by the red carpet as a microcosm of celebrity (itself a microcosm of a bunch of stuff we just don’t even have room for right now, I wrote two books about it and I haven’t even scratched the surface of my thoughts on performance, image, audience, dress, and absurdity, because it’s just where we all live now, I don’t make the rules). Every year seems to up the ante on surreal Byzantine flourishes. This year’s entry: The Curtain. The red carpet has changed this year. The stars walk on the main portion and any ticket… Read more »

Nothing says red carpet season like a starlet styled to within an inch of her life descending into the many-lensed abyss. Thanks, Golden Globes! I will never stop thinking about this photo no matter how much I try.… Read more »

:sinister carnival music in the distance reaches a sudden fever pitch: Oh hey, it’s the Oscars!… Read more »

Welcome to the Red Carpet Rundown of the BAFTAs, tha red carpet that pretends it’s more sophisticated and understanding than those Other red carpets (look! Soothing greenery!), until you actually look at it:   (Please understand how sincerely I mean this: Yikes.) This event certainly never stood a chance against the Grammys, where much bigger statements are made. Like Cardi B, who wore 1995 Thierry Mugler Birth-of-Venus couture right down to the headpiece purely to make the statement that she has achieved the sort of red carpet clout where you can dig into designer archives for a dress that requires an assistant whose only job is to walk you successfully between photo stops. (Though for my money, the best dress on the Grammys carpet was on Jorja Smith – the kind of dress that reminds you “embellished sheath” doesn’t sound particularly daring, but can sometimes be a formalwear-barnacle wonderland.)     But still, even if you’ve been scheduled opposite the bigger party, the show must go on, because those critical wheels of publicity, favors, security staff, assistants, crowd… Read more »

Once again, the most high-stakes red carpet parade of all has come and gone.   As the broadcast (and the photo backdrop, and the ad bumpers) kept reminding us, this was the 90th anniversary of the Oscars. I actually watched all those things because I got talked into an in-person viewing party, which meant going through the whole business in real time. Since my opinion of two of those dresses changed after seeing them in motion, we’ll pretend I was watching for research. Plus, during the very overwrought bit about carrying snacks into the theater for the common people, I got to imagine how many security guards had to race across the street during a commercial break to keep an eye on all the jewelry. And jewelry was back in a big way this carpet! This whole carpet felt like something of a throwback, honestly, like everyone was wary of seeming TOO gleeful when Ashley Judd, Mira Sorvino, and Salma Hayek’s truly gobsmacking jeweled shoulder drapes were still taking the stage to accept conciliatory applause from… Read more »